By the time I got home, I felt small and defeated. I had spent the day with other women in ministry. Instead of gaining the encouragement and strength that I should have breathed in from being with women that I love, I sank into the comparison trapbuilt thought by thought in my head.
These were the thoughts that filled my head and trickled into my shrinking heart: “She has the most up-to-date, state-of-the-art blog and thousands of readers. I need to learn more and work harder. That woman over there speaks almost every weekend. What can I do to work to market my speaking ministry better? So many of these women have published books. Maybe I just don’t have what it takes…”
Not one single woman in that room said or did anything besides loving me. The comparison trap is one that’s self-built in my life and one that I have struggled with mightily since I began speaking.
It’s my desire to write a blog post next week to talk about the unique value you bring to audiences, but I wanted to start here this week, because I have a little inkling that I’m not the only one who struggles. 🙂
Although each of us has value that we bring with us when we speak, I want to start with this reminder. Our value to God, the most important One of all, doesn’t have anything to do with what we do. Anna, my best friend in college, once was asked by her brother, “Anna what about you do you think pleases God?” (This question was meant to be a little bit of a trap, because her brother was slightly disapproving about some of Anna’s actions. He wanted an accounting of her activities.) Anna replied with such a profound answer. She said, “It pleases God that when I get out of the shower in the morning and I shake my head, my hair curls in tiny ringlets all over.”
Do you believe that? Do you believe that God values you and delights in you just because He created you unique in all the world?
Here’s a quote that sets me free from my tendency to want to work to show God that I have value: “You are more than a ministry machine.”
Let that soak in for a minute.
Even though you are called to speaking ministry, that is not your value. Your value isn’t in having the most tech savvy website. It’s not in how many articles you have published. It’s not even how many people give their lives to Christ at your next event. It pleases God when we want to serve Him well, but mostly He is pleased by us.
Friend, carry this through your day. You are God’s dearly loved child. He delights in you. Your value is in Him.